My Big Rant on ‘The Twilight Saga’

Before we get started, I’d like to point out that this post was inspired by a YouTube video from one of my favorite YouTubers called, “i watched the twilight movies for the first time.” While this person made some very good points on why this film series is trash, there were some points where I felt like she could’ve cut the movies some slack. Instead of arguing with her in the comments, I decided to post about my thoughts on these movies because I have a lot of history with The Twilight Saga and it holds a special place in my heart. So with all that said, let’s get on with the rant!

So, first of all, the film series is based on the novels by Stephenie Meyer; the books are centered on the relationship between a human named Bella Swan and a vampire named Edward Cullen. I never saw the first film in theaters, but I remember seeing the next four films in theaters. I never read the books, so I didn’t know what the heck was going on and who any of the characters were.

When I did watch the first film, I thought it was boring as heck and my feelings have not changed since. The pace of the film was so slow. Bella was clearly attracted to Edward, but he couldn’t control himself around her scent, so he tried to get away from her. Then, when he finally worked up the courage to talk to her, he was being a jerk by saying, “we shouldn’t be friends,” yet, he kept on coming back to her. Then, when Edward stopped the car from hitting Bella, she grew suspicious and Edward was like, “no one’s going to believe you.” And I was like, “you f*cking jerk!” 

There were a lot of cringe worthy scenes in Twilight (2008), like the YouTuber pointed out. There was the scene where Bella and Edward were dancing to no music in Edward’s room. Don’t forget about the scene where Bella confronts Edward about being a vampire. He tried so hard to make Bella afraid of him by jumping in and out of trees, screaming at her, and throwing rocks. I’m like dude, “I’m so over this!” This is why I hate dudes who try so hard to be bad boys. The best scene in the film was probably the baseball scene, where the vampires played baseball in the eye of a storm (I believe there was lightning and it was cloudy in that scene). 

The thing about Kristen Stewart, I don’t think she’s a bad actress; she’s good at being in pain. It’s just her monotone voice can be a bit annoying at times (*cough cough* Taylor Swift). Bella wasn’t exactly the brightest character either. Like, when James tricked her into believing her mom was in danger, she went to the ballet studio, even though the vampires told her to stay in the room for her safety. I mean come on, this dude was trying to kill her and would do anything to try to get her attention; Bella should’ve seen it coming.

New Moon (2009) tried to tackle mental health, shown through Bella’s depression after Edward left her. Bella’s life was put in danger, once again, after Jasper almost attacked her, forcing Edward to push Bella into a table. Like seriously, he could’ve just told her to get out of the way or gently push her to the side, instead of full-on injuring her even further.

It’s pretty obvious that Bella still wants to be with Edward after all of that chaos and she so desperately wants to be a vampire. However, Edward chooses to leave her because he doesn’t want to put her in any more danger and feels like she’ll be better off without him. One of the main things I learned from high school was that avoiding people is never the answer, so that was dumb, especially since Bella was so dang in love with him.

Another good point that the YouTuber brought up was that her family and friends didn’t really help Bella deal with her depression. When she was crashing motorcycles and getting involved with dangerous people, her friends thought that she was crazy and her dad told her to spend more time with Jacob to forget about Edward. Then, when Bella’s friendship with Jacob develops further, he cuts ties with her because his werewolf powers are heating up. I mean, that’s gotta suck: her boyfriend leaves her and her best friend leaves her. Unlike the YouTuber, I enjoyed the cliffhanger in the end, where Edward asks Bella to marry him because it leaves the audience wondering what her response will be (at least for those that haven’t read the books).

When we get to Eclipse (2010), Bella is still obsessed with wanting to be a vampire and Edward makes a deal with her: he’ll change her if Bella marries him. The YouTuber was strictly against this idea, but I don’t mind it. The reason why Edward wants to marry her is so that he can be with her and know that she’s committed to him. Also, because the Volturi will kill any human who knows about vampires, Bella could be put in danger, but if she’s with the Cullens for good, then the Volturi will eventually have to accept her. Being a vampire is a huge commitment, so Edward just wants to know if she’s all in and won’t regret her decision.

I don’t watch the first two films as much as the last three because I think starting with Eclipse, the pace starts to pick up a bit more and interesting stuff happens. Unfortunately, Eclipse is also the movie where Jacob and Edward’s flaws are highlighted to the max. Edward tries so hard to prevent Bella from seeing Jacob because he doesn’t trust Jacob since he’s a werewolf. But, let’s be real, Edward just doesn’t trust Bella and feels like she will leave him. But, hello dude, you’re the one that left her in the first place and she needed a shoulder to cry on.

Jacob is no good either, though, as he basically forces himself on Bella and tries to convince her to pick him instead of Edward. Like, the dude kisses her without her permission and Bella breaks her hand punching Jacob’s face. He also kind of manipulated her into kissing him again. After Jacob overhears Edward talking about being engaged to Bella, Jacob gets upset and says that he’ll get himself killed in the battle, even though Bella begs him not to. She tells him that Jacob’s too important to her, but that’s still not good enough for him, so Bella then tells him to kiss her because that’s what he wants. Not going to lie, that was some kiss, but at the same time, it was messed up!

The highlights of Eclipse were the battle sequence, Victoria’s scenes with Riley (I kind of shipped them, despite Victoria using him), and the werewolf and vampire backstories. I kind of wish we saw Alice and Emmett’s backstories because I always liked Alice’s mysterious vibe and Emmett was transformed after being mauled by a bear. I mean for a movie set mostly outdoors, it would’ve been nice if we saw at least one bear in the film.

Leah and Seth Clearwater were introduced in this movie, and I wish we got more scenes and info about them. Yeah, Jacob talks about how Sam used to date Leah, but the relationship ends because he imprints on her cousin Emily, but that wasn’t enough for me. I think Leah’s failed love story was more interesting than Bella’s love triangle with Edward and Jacob. I mean, her boyfriend imprinted on her cousin and she has to see Emily at family get-togethers, she’s in Sam’s wolf pack, meaning she can’t seem to get away from those two. Sam and Leah don’t even talk to each other in the films, they look at each other once in Breaking Dawn: Part 1 (2011), but that’s about it.

The second to the last film depicts Bella and Edward’s wedding, they have sex for the first time, Bella gets pregnant, and Sam plots to kill Bella and her unknown baby. The YouTuber found it gross for a grown man, like Edward, to pursue a teenage girl, like Bella. I don’t entirely agree with her because Edward was 17-years-old when he was changed into a vampire and Bella was about 17-years-old when they first met, so technically Edward is still a teenager. Also, Edward was changed so young, so he lacked a lot of human experiences and never had a true love, until he met Bella. So, his immaturity and trust issues make sense because he didn’t know better.

I think that Bella’s nervous reaction at the wedding was normal as she does not like attention and didn’t even want to get married in the first place. I don’t have too many complaints about Breaking Dawn: Part 1 because Jacob was finally taking control of his life by being a leader, instead of a follower in Sam’s pack. Seth and Leah also broke away from Sam’s pack to support Jacob and help the Cullens. One of my favorite scenes in the film is when Jacob tells Leah to go back to Sam’s pack, but she refuses because she doesn’t want to be the “pathetic ex-girlfriend that he can’t get away from.” That proves why Leah deserved more screen time in the films. 

Also, I hate how Edward got all the hate for Bella’s pregnancy when it was her idea to have sex. Edward warned her a million times that he might hurt her because of his physical strength, but Bella didn’t seem to mind. Then again, think of all the danger she put herself in: she went to see James and almost got killed, jumped off a cliff, crashed a motorcycle, cut herself to distract Riley and Victoria, and nearly died giving birth to her child. Well, technically she dies from the latter, but nevermind! The point is, if she can handle all of that, having sex should be nothing for Bella!

The scene that really confuses me, however, is when Jacob imprints on Renesmee. Like, is that legal? She’s a f*cking baby! Also, Rosalie, who was carrying Renesmee, had no idea Jacob was trying to sneak up on her, which is strange because vampires have a strong sense of smell and can hear very well. It’s like her powers stopped working for that brief moment, so that Jacob could imprint on Renesmee; Rosalie just happened to lift up the baby, so that Jacob could look into Renesmee’s eyes.

I thought some of the deleted scenes for Breaking Dawn: Part 1 were entertaining and should’ve been kept in the movie. Like the scene where Bella tells Edward that she never realized how great being human could be or the one where Jacob throws a hotdog at Rosalie (that got a laugh out of Emmett and Edward). In both of those scenes, Edward smiled a lot, which was nice because it was cool to see him loosen up and enjoy himself more, since he’s more tense and stone-cold in the films. But really, the creators should’ve kept the scene where Edward throws Jacob against a wall after discovering that he imprinted on Renesmee. Because they cut out that scene, it seemed like only Bella freaked out when Jacob imprinted on Renesmee, when in actuality, Edward was just as upset.

Breaking Dawn: Part 2 (2012) is actually my favorite film out of the franchise because we got more vampires, the werewolves made peace with the Cullens, and Bella’s glow-up was freaking amazing! Bella looked gorgeous and much more confident as a vampire. I loved her edgy and tight black clothing, her dark make-up, and she had more thick, full wavy hair. I wanted Bella’s vampire wardrobe so badly (I still do)! The stylist for this film got it spot on: Bella was hiding behind her baggy clothes when she was a human, but when she became a vampire, she became more comfortable with who she was and decided to own her new status as a vampire!

I loved seeing all the new vampires and how they differed from one another, appearance and personality-wise. One of them was played by Rami Malek, who’d go on to play Freddie Mercury in the Queen biopic, Bohemian Rhapsody (2018). I also loved the pairing of Kate and Garrett because the latter acted all tough and he needed someone, like Kate, who could bring that danger and excitement to his life. Besides, the scene where Kate shocks Garrett with her powers and he’s like, “you are an amazing woman,” is pretty epic!

As for the vampires I hate, I don’t get the Volturi, they don’t like dragging attention to the vampire community and kill anyone who knows about them, yet, they always allow bad stuff to happen. In Eclipse, they let Victoria carry on with her army of newborn vampires, knowing that they want to destroy the Cullen family. The Volturi have had their eyes on Alice and Edward because they think their powers (of seeing the future and reading people’s minds) could be very useful to their coven. They are very manipulative and because of their powers, other vampires are afraid of the Volturi. That explains why the Cullens struggled to find other vampires that would stand up to the Volturi and help prove that Renesmee wasn’t an immortal child.

Then, we have Irina, Kate and Tanya’s adoptive sister. She’s hated Bella ever since the wolves killed Laurent, her lover, because they were protecting Bella. Irina acted coldly to her at the wedding, so, of course, she’s going to do something dumb and tell the Volturi that Renesmee is an immortal child. I get that she hates Bella, but she could’ve talked to the Cullens about her assumptions; because of her mistake, she lost her life. I don’t entirely blame Irina, because I’d be upset to lose a lover as well, but come on, talk it out and don’t avoid people. Especially since it was such a serious subject, as her adoptive mother created an immortal child and lost her life because of it.

Now, Jacob was annoying as heck in Breaking Dawn: Part 2. First of all, he wouldn’t even let Bella hold Renesmee for a minute because he wanted her all to himself. Second of all, Jacob freaked out when the Cullens told him that they were leaving Forks, so he told Charlie (Bella’s dad) that he was a werewolf to prevent the Cullens from moving. Third of all, Jacob wanted to kill Renesmee at first and now all of a sudden, he’s into her?!?! In the movie, he’s acting more like a guardian and pal to Renesmee, but then in one of the last scenes, Jacob jokingly asks if he should call Edward, “dad,” and Edward is like, “hell no!” 

How would Jacob and Renesmee work as a couple anyways?!?! Renesmee will be full-grown in about seven years, but then Jacob will continue getting older, and the age gap will continue getting worse and worse. Will Renesmee still be with Jacob when he’s an elderly man?!?! But, like the YouTuber said in her video, it seems bizarre to date someone where you have to wait seven years until you can finally sleep with them and others won’t stare at the couple weirdly in public. So, yes the ending where Alice sees a vision of Jacob and Renesmee as a couple grosses me out a bit.

In conclusion, all of The Twilight Saga movies are horrible, but they’re so bad that they’re enjoyable to watch. Take these movies as lessons on what not to do in a romantic relationship. Don’t manipulate a girl to kiss you, don’t tell your girlfriend not to hang out with her best friend, and don’t leave your girlfriend after she makes it clear that she wants to be with you. Thankfully, each movie in the series got slightly better (in my opinion). Also, the vampires’ wardrobe in these films is amazing! Oh, and I don’t ship Bella with Edward or Jacob because both are terrible dudes.

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Lana